So, like thousands of listeners do every day, I was listening to Bill’s show the other morning in my car, and suddenly, it wasn’t Bill’s voice anymore – it was the dead pan voice of a woman talking about some food delivery service. Oh wait… it was my voice. I cringed. It wasn’t very good. I really wasn’t doing the product justice, my feelings weren’t coming through.. I mean, I really do love Celebrity Foods.

So, I called my girlfriend Ilene and told her, “Ilene, I just listened to my commercial for Celebrity Foods, and it sounded awful. Why do I sound so blah, when I’m not?” Ilene didn’t know, either. She asked, “Well you do love the product right? I mean, you’re always talking to me about, and my mouth waters just thinking about the cheesecake.” I told her that of course I did. I mean, we’ve been using Celebrity Foods for years. We love it, we’re completely satisfied and happy with it, the service is great, and we tell everyone we know that they really must sign up for it. So, why can’t I just say that on the radio? I just freeze up in front of the microphone.

When I picked up Barbara and Pamela from school that day, I told them that I wasn’t happy with the commercials, but they can only be so empathetic because they definitely have the Microphone Gene. Bill and the girls are constantly full of energy (and opinions), and they freely share it with the world. On one hand, I envy that, but on the other hand, we can’t all be good at everything. There are plenty of things that I do better than Bill, after all – not to mention, people don’t call in and yell at me every morning.

I’m a fairly reserved personality and always have been. Over my 20 years of marriage to Bill, I’ve come out of my shell a lot —, I’ve had to in self defense. At the end of the day, I’m a little disappointed that I wasn’t able to explain this product on the radio like I’d meant to, but I have to say that I’m greatly relieved to hand the task over to a very capable spokesperson (Bill) who will definitely do it justice.

Now here’s the great part about this whole process – while I’ve confirmed that I don’t have a radio voice, I’ve learned that I do have an online voice. I believe that the official term is Blogger, and as such, I will continue to share more information about the Handel family with you right here at meetthehandels.com.

So, Bill… you can’t fire me, because I quit… or rather, I have been promoted to the… er… Internet Communications Director for the Handel Family. And seeing as it’s Friday, my first order of business will be to file a gripe for Friday Gripe Night (in the Morning): “What’s the deal with a loud-mouthed radio guy going on the air and talking about his wife’s commercial? Shouldn’t he be covering the news or something?!”

Marjorie “Blogger” Handel, signing off.

P.S. Just for fun — Here’s my last commercial followed by Bill’s replacement spot… What more can I say…

Marjorie’s Commerical

Bill’s Response/Commercial